I wanted to let you all know about the upcoming blog tour for Sky Song with the very lovely people at Fiction Addiction tours. I thought about what to write for a little while, but I couldn’t really come up with anything entertaining. It’s been some time since I wrote anything with Jacob and his friends in, so instead of telling you about the tour myself, I couldn’t resist bringing out the guys for one last time…
Jacob stood staring at the pile of clothes and the empty suitcase on his bed. He scratched his head and then looked up at Ellen.
‘You’re worse than a girl,’ she laughed. ‘Just put something in, we’re never going to be ready.’
Luca grinned as he lounged on the bedroom floor. ‘I was done in minutes flat.’
‘I bet you only took one change of clothes,’ Ellen replied. ‘It’s no wonder.’
‘It’s a book tour, how many changes of clothing could I need?’
‘You have to have some standards,’ said Ellen.
‘This book tour…’ Luca began, ‘are there going to be good looking women on it?’
‘Apart from you, Ell, of course,’ Luca said quickly.
‘Seriously,’ Jacob said as he stuffed a sweatshirt into the case, ‘you know you give all males a bad name?’ He glanced at Ellen.
‘Ha ha, Jake, Ellen is not falling for that I’m so sensitive act that you put on. I know you were thinking the same thing.’
‘I was not.’ Jacob said, doing his best to look outraged at the implication. Then he grinned. ‘Are there, though?’
Ellen rolled her eyes. ‘You’re both ridiculous. You have to be polite to all the tour hosts and the coordinator or Sharon will be furious with you.’
‘Who’s Sharon?’ Luca asked.
‘Sharon Sant! Only the woman who created you!’
‘Is she good looking?’
Ellen frowned. ‘I think she’s, like, really old. And quite short… oh what am I saying, it doesn’t matter! Stop being such a sleaze, you’re just impossible.’
‘That’s not my fault,’ Luca said with a hurt expression. ‘Sharon made me like this so if I ask whether she’s hot, that’s her fault.’
‘He’s got a point,’ Jacob said.
Luca thought for a moment and his expression clouded. ‘You don’t think Sharon heard me say that, do you?’ He looked up at the ceiling as if I might be hiding in there.
‘Of course she did, you douche, she’s making you say it!’ Ellen replied.
‘You mean she’s here right now?’
‘How on earth do you think any of us are here right now? She’s omnipresent and she can make us do anything – I mean, we live or die by her hand. And if you’re not careful she’ll have you sticking a kipper up your nose.’
‘Wow!’ Luca said in awe. ‘So she’s like some all-powerful guardian of a world?’
‘It’s not a new concept, Luca,’ Ellen said drily.
‘What do you think your mum goes to church for every Sunday?’
‘I don’t know. I think she quite fancies the priest…’
‘She goes to pray to an all-powerful guardian of our world.’
Luca gave a confused frown.
‘God!’ Ellen said, her voice rising in exasperation.
Jacob looked up from trying to locate some deodorant in a drawer. ‘Was someone talking to me?’
Ellen sighed. ‘Go back to your packing, Jacob.’
‘Where are we staying, anyway?’ Luca asked trying not to snigger now.
‘I suppose we’ll stay with each of the tour hosts as we go on our way,’ Ellen said. ‘They’re all over the world.’
‘Are there any in New Zealand?’ Luca asked with a wink.
‘Only people who have read the book will get that joke, Luca, and as the point of the tour is to persuade people to read the book, I think that your clever quip might be a bit wasted at this stage.’
‘I hope we get separate rooms,’ Jacob cut in, raising his eyebrows at Luca, ‘you snore.’
‘I snore?’ Luca cried. ‘That’s rich coming from you.’
‘I don’t snore,’ Jacob said sniffing at a trainer before deciding to throw it into the case.
‘You do,’ Luca said, ‘you snore like the Astraen equivalent of a water buffalo.’
‘Astraen water buffalos aren’t so noisy, they sort of squeak, really,’ Jacob answered thoughtfully.
‘For Pete’s sake!’ Ellen said, throwing her hands into the air. ‘Would you just get ready, we’re going to be late and Sharon will have to go without us!’
‘I’m done!’ Luca cried. ‘It’s old Watcher Lightfoot over there holding us up. Who knew being a cosmic guardian needed such a coordinated wardrobe?’
‘Shut it, Valvona, we don’t all want to parade around in a black thong for the whole two weeks,’ Jacob said.
‘You’re just jealous because you could never pull off a black thong,’ Luca fired back.
Jacob grinned at him. ‘Who the hell would want to?’ He turned to Ellen. ‘Where are we stopping off?’
Ellen pulled out a piece of paper and unfolded it. ‘This is the tour itinerary that Sharon from Fiction Addiction gave me –’
‘Is she good looking,’ Luca interrupted.
‘Funny,’ Ellen frowned. ‘Do you want me to tell you or not?’
‘Yes, he does,’ Jacob said. ‘Go on.’
‘First stop,’ Ellen began again, ‘is on 8th July for Me, My Books and I. Second stop is on 9th July at Love, Laughter, Friendship. 10th July is A Novel Review, followed by Review Buzz on 11th July and Bookalicious Travel Addict on 12th July –’
‘Are there going to be many more of these?’ Luca cut in.
Ellen glared at him.
‘Sorry, just asking.’
‘You get the weekend off,’ Ellen continued. ‘Then we have Stephanie Keyes in the US on 15th July, Tugcenin Kitapligi on 16th July, Lucky Books from Romania on 17th July, Amy Bookworm –’
‘She’s cute,’ Luca interrupted.
‘Luca,’ Jacob said, ‘if you don’t let Ellen finish, she’ll be in my mum’s freezer looking for a kipper to stick up your nose, never mind Sharon.’
Luca grinned. ‘Sorry.’
Ellen threw Jacob a grateful look. ‘Amy is on 18th July and then finally it’s Bookishly Devoted on 19th July.’
‘Cool, sounds like fun,’ Luca said.
‘I think it will be,’ Ellen replied, ‘if we can put up with each other for two weeks with no incidents involving kippers and nasal cavities.’ She turned to Jacob, who was just fastening his suitcase. ‘Ready?’
Jacob nodded. ‘Ready. Let’s do this!’